thanks giving

happy thanksgiving!

there are a lot of things for which i am thankful.

if you are reading this, you are one of those things.

poem for the day

Black Rook in Rainy Weather

On the stiff twig up there
Hunches a wet black rook
Arranging and rearranging its feathers in the rain-
I do not expect a miracle
Or an accident

To set the sight on fire
In my eye, nor seek
Any more in the desultory weather some design,
But let spotted leaves fall as they fall
Without ceremony, or portent.

Although, I admit, I desire,
Occasionally, some backtalk
From the mute sky, I can't honestly complain:
A certain minor light may still
Lean incandescent

Out of kitchen table or chair
As if a celestial burning took
Possession of the most obtuse objects now and then --
Thus hallowing an interval
Otherwise inconsequent

By bestowing largesse, honor
One might say love. At any rate, I now walk
Wary (for it could happen
Even in this dull, ruinous landscape); sceptical
Yet politic, ignorant

Of whatever angel may choose to flare
Suddenly at my elbow. I only know that a rook
Ordering its black feathers can so shine
As to seize my senses, haul
My eyelids up, and grant

A brief respite from fear
Of total neutrality. With luck,
Trekking stubborn through this season
Of fatigue, I shall
Patch together a content

Of sorts. Miracles occur.
If you care to call those spasmodic
Tricks of radiance
Miracles. The wait's begun again,
The long wait for the angel,

For that rare, random descent.

- sylvia plath

nothing to say. so disappointing.

hello.

so it's been a while, and it seems like i don't have much to say. life is a bit difficult these days, for various reasons. and sharing my issues with various Friends and Professionals leaves me feeling pretty spent.

so i come to the blog fairly often but generally just end up staring at the blank screen, and quitting without writing a word.

so.

is this better than nothing?


i have a short week this week, just 2 1/2 days of work, and then a long weekend. monday i head back to the east coast, a day in jersey and another couple in connecticut (does anyone else feel like there are one too many 'c's in that word?). i really enjoy traveling, love flying, love being in hotel rooms, love the feeling of freedom and independence. so i am looking forward to next week.

thanksgiving is at our house on thursday. mom and dad and uncle and auntie are coming, and all bringing things, so all i have to do is the turkey and the sweet potatoes. not a bad gig. i do also need to clean the floors and the bathroom etc, but that is not such a big deal.

really what i am looking forward to is sleeping in on friday. and saturday. and perhaps throwing in a nap or two here or there.

can you believe it is only 9:30? and i have only been here for an hour and a half??


man, this sucks. sorry for the Lamest Post Ever.

the room of 10,000 fears

a guru has a class of 100 students, and he tells them that he can help them arrive at nirvana with a shortcut. that shortcut is entering and going through the Room of Ten Thousand Fears, wherein one must face each and every one of his own fears. heights, spiders, death- each fear becomes real as you move through this room. and not all make it through, because once you enter the room, the door behind you disappears, and you cannot exit the room the same way you go into it. with this, 90 students get up and leave, preferring to continue their quest without this shortcut. the guru expresses his pride in the remaining 10, and shares with them the secret of passing through the room. once you are inside the room, and your fears are coming true and are coming upon you one after the other, you will want to stop, to close your eyes, to turn and run. the secret is to KEEP WALKING, and you will reach the other door.

and another thing

a happy birthday shout out to StayC, whom i adore. i hope your day is full of love and happiness. since that is what you bring into my life, it would only be fair.

i love you!

friends

in the past two days, i have had two conversations, with two dear friends. you know who you are. and really, all i can say, is thank you. you are honest, and kind, and above all, you love me. for which i cannot tell you how grateful i am (it gets a bit awkward, this never-ending-one's-sentences-with-a-preposition).

anyway, i was feeling a bit lost in the proverbial storm, and now i feel as though i am in safe harbour again.

so i thank you.